Sunday, December 13, 2009

Baby sleeping with parents: PROS AND CONS

Many moms extremely troubling question: whether to put your baby to sleep with them or better, so he slept in his crib? The question is really very important. What are the pluses and minuses of both options are sleeping, how to wean a child to sleep with parents?



Son - an essential element for human life. For health, perhaps, he means nothing less than the food.



In sleep the body is resting, recovering from a stress accumulates vitality. They say that children are growing up in a dream.



But how to decide where is best to sleep baby: the mummy at the side or in your cozy little nest?



After the birth of each child are often ready a comfortable bed and beautiful.



So far on this issue there is no single solution. The views and pediatricians, and psychologists in this regard often diverge. Of course, the choice is yours.



After all children are different: some quiet to sleep, only when falling asleep with her mother, the other - in a separate bed from day one.



It is to experiment and put a child in a crib. If your baby does not sleep - means, to put next to him, and he suddenly calmed down?



When considering any matter, there are always pluses and minuses, the views of the pros and cons. Let us, together we shall understand, that it is better specifically for you?
Arguments for sleeping together



Let us turn to nature. In all animals in natural conditions, sleeping together with calves - standard of living, physiological needs.



People - mammals, so why all should be otherwise - because the nature of everything has been thought for many, many years ago.



Should I change the age-old traditions in the spirit of modern civilization?



Anthropologists have found that sleeping together is practiced in most cultures of the world - is an ancient and time-tested tradition for millennia.



So, let us details on the pros:



1. Kid, accustomed to for 9 months to the rhythm of my mother's breathing, the sound of her heart, being a mom in one bed, no doubt, feels almost like before - under protection.



That is, we provide a Tiny psychological comfort. Joint sleep strengthens the psyche of children, supports the credibility of the outside world, and inspires confidence.



Some psychologists believe that sleeping together in the future provide children mental health, self-esteem, lack of anxiety and depression.



2. For my mother, perhaps the main advantage is no need to jump up in the night, that they might take the hand of a crying baby and feed or comfort him.



Baby should be breast milk on demand, and most kids are actively suck at night.



In the end, mom gets complete rest, and the baby - easy access to food and mother's warmth.



In addition, the female organism is designed so that the maximum concentrations of prolactin - the hormone that leads to the development of milk - fall on the night.



And bodily contact with the baby stimulates these processes. Thus, the dream is shared according to the WHO (World Health Organization), a stimulator of breast-feeding.



3. Tactile stimulation is important both for the full development of the nervous system of the baby, and for the free operation of the respiratory center, and therefore co-sleep with their parents less and less Sudden infant death syndrome (SIDS risk is reduced by several times).



When a child sleeps with his mother, his sleep is less deep.



Because of the shallow sleep better wake up and, therefore, easier to call for help, submit signals if something is not right.



4. Co-sleeping helps awaken maternal instincts. Mother develops intuition, she feels that the child should be at the moment.



In addition, a woman gets more positive emotions of motherhood, if her baby sleeps next to him.



5. Contact with the child during sleep reduces anxiety mothers (in fact increased anxiety - excessive stress, not going to benefit nursing woman), and also helps get rid of postpartum depression.



6. Child is easier to tolerate fear, typical of certain ages. So, first appears about 1-1,5 years - is the fear of losing her mother - and the kids go to my mother, as tails, not letting even the toilet.



Somewhere in 1,5-2 years there is fear of the dark. Kid does not want to be alone in a dark room. Many problems start with falling asleep.



If you notice in your baby such fears, it is necessary to find the cause of restless sleep of the child (refer to a psychologist or a neurologist).



Children who always slept with their parents, are usually easily and painlessly pass their first night terrors and shifted in their separate beds after 3 years.



7. It has been suggested that, in sharing the same dream, sleep cycles, and therefore easier to wake up her mother with a baby (and then mother and child as easily fall asleep), or to prevent the awakening of crumbs gentle stroking.



For the young child is characterized by mostly superficial, shallow sleep.



Baby's brain continues to grow and develop in a phase of shallow sleep. At this time the child controls, where his mother, whether it is close.



In that case, if mother and child sleep alone, the baby may appear a long deep sleep as a protective reaction to stress.



8. Co-sleeping helps to fill the lack of communication (especially mothers, leaving early for work).



9. Since thermoregulation of the child, especially a newborn, yet imperfect, you can be confident that side by side with you it does not freeze.



10. And the last argument: how positive emotions are mom and baby from the joint holiday, contact, skin to skin, the type of each other - not describe in words. This can only be felt.



If you put the baby in his crib, but he refuses to be there to protest, shouting and crying, take him to her, - all will be better.



It is not necessary in such a way to raise a child: "weep, and he goes to sleep" or "let the lungs develop.



Of course, the statute, the baby calms down and eventually fall asleep, but unmet need to be with her mother affect later in the form of long night weeping. And only need to put a child beside him.



Over time, these kids go quietly in their bed, because they need to successfully satisfy my mother.



Any psychologist will tell you that the unmet need grows into a complex, which is waiting for its implementation.
The arguments against co-sleeping



Benjamin Spock said that the child needed immediately, not only his own bed, but his own room.



His personal space to even the smallest child to create a complete identity and autonomy.



What are the disadvantages of a shared dream?



1. Some believe that babies always sleep with my father and mother, produces a psychological dependence on parents.



In fact, these children have the first 3 years a great need for parental attention, but gradually, as they grow older, everything falls into place, the baby needs changing.



And the children become as independent as peers.



2. Parents are afraid that the child, accustomed to sleep with them, then do not want to go to his bed.



Output is: you can put a child to sleep, and then shifted to his crib, and for the convenience of lift crib and brought up her close to her.



So we get more space, and at the same time, everyone will sleep in his place.



With regard to the reluctance to sleep in his bed, in children aged 2-3 years is the realization of his own ego. All my mother hears "I'll (a).



That is the blessed moment when you can offer the child "fix" their individuality, and now that "we are so big and independent," then it is time to have a separate sleeping place. And perhaps a child, even offers it first.



Care should be taken only on that kid, going to sleep in own bed, did not perceive it as punishment.



Never say to him: "Are you going to behave badly - you go to sleep in his bed," etc.



If the child is sleeping peacefully in her bed, whether you want to take him?



Perhaps, in such a situation would be better to exploit the situation and do not teach the baby to the parental bed.



If the crumbs convenient and comfortable, it did not worry, sleep separately and enjoy the tenderness of touch during the day.



3. There is a "popular" fear "overlay" of the child. Proved that the cerebral cortex mother is very sensitive to even the crumbs in a dream.



And if such cases are described, then the mothers under the influence of alcohol, sleeping pills or drugs or mentally unhealthy.



The only thing to note: if a woman is very tired - it is not necessary to pack crumbs next, better sleep arm in arm on another occasion, as in this case sleep mom can be quite profound.



Wings spout baby does not restrict the access of air, even if he utknetsya their mother in the chest.



If the mom before birth and were distinguished by a deep sleep after the birth of your baby sleep becomes very sensitive.



As pope, he has no maternal instincts, and he can hurt the crumbs, turning in his sleep.



So it is better to be sure to put the baby between them and the wall or each other and the edge of the bed.



But there is another danger to the child - rolled off the bed onto the floor. To avoid this, make a fence of pillows or a rolled-up blanket roll.



4. Parents' bed - it is not only a place to sleep, but the marriage bed.



Sleep in a room with a child imposes restrictions on the intimate relationships of parents, and sleeping together in the same bed - even more so.



For some, simply move away to the edge of the bed, for others it will only fit another room.



Output is from any situation: you can shift the baby in his crib, you can own to learn new places to love games.



Some shy, afraid that the baby may suddenly wake up and catch the parents at the wrong time.



But nothing wrong in this case does not happen: young children still do not understand, but if you have any questions for older children - you can discuss them later, and just stay with my child until he falls asleep again.



Sometimes a woman would be partitioned off as a baby from a spouse, avoiding sexual contact.



And if at first it may be due to simple fatigue, then over time - causing problems in the family.



And in any case we can not allow this major cause of discord was a baby, and for the pope, and that's how it will look.



A similar situation arises when the bed of the spouses not wide enough and dad "evicted", he has to sleep alone, what consciously or not he blames the child.



5. Some parents are afraid to spoil the crumb. Remember, co-sleeping is impossible to spoil the child.



If a kid wants to sleep with you - this is not a whim, this is - need.



Although some psychologists believe that children who are sleeping with adults, will grow more dependent, anxious, and infantile.



6. Hygiene. Well, breastfeeding baby can up his bed, a sheet and blanket, and for the older child is not necessary.



After all, the flora in the mother and child who is breastfed, the same.



7. Mom should not feel discomfort during sleep. Usually, if from the very beginning, from the first weeks of her mother sleeps with the child, this problem does not exist.



If the first month of each holds in his bed, then later mom needs time to get used to the fact that the baby beside her. Usually a couple of weeks my mother gets used and eventually sleep more.
How to make a safe sleeping together?



The surface on which the sleeping child, should be flat and firm enough.



Near the baby should not be pillows and blankets.



Do not lay a child between the parents - put a better edge. And that the child did not fall, the bed can fasten to the wall or make a roll of blankets.



They must not run down, in this case, deep sleep is similar to that for alcohol.



Remember that heat your body creates extra heating baby.



In order not to overheat the baby sleep in a joint, use at least a warm night clothes and blankets. Child does not have to swaddle.



This prevents him regulate body temperature, and the crumb can greatly sweat. In addition, it will be difficult to adjust to feeding, or simply inconvenient.



If mom big breasts, then sleep with the child should be especially careful.



It is better to provide a separate blanket for the baby: so it will be easier to discard it if you suddenly become hot.



Leave a night light turned on so that you woke up, could see the situation of the child.



How to wean a child to sleep with their parents



Wean the child to sleep in the parental bed should gradually. It is better if this process starts at the age of 2-3 years. The main thing - patience and desire.



Perhaps, this period is delayed for several months. Teach a child to sleep in separate bed will be easier if you use the following tips:



attract the child to choose their own beds, bed linen;



need to practice regularly sleep apart from their parents - for example, daily;



suggest to the child to sleep with a favorite teddy bear or a rabbit;



sing him a lullaby at night or read a story;



if a baby is afraid of the dark, while not close the door to his room, or turn on the nightlight;



crib where the baby sleeps, you can gradually move away from the parent: first, to the other wall, and then you can, and in another room;



Older children (3-4 years), we can arrange a "Celebration of resettlement, and so in the form of a game to transfer the child in his bed;



tell me baby, what are the big boys and girls, as he slept in their rooms;



And finally, be prepared to ensure that the child will come to you first.



In conclusion, I recommend not to rush to send your baby to sleep separately, if you see that he is not ready, if in his life witnessed major changes (the beginning of kindergarten, moving, birth of brother or sister).



Try in advance to arrange transfer of the child in his own bed for a few months before the proposed event or a few months after.



Trust your parental instincts and do as they see fit.



In any case, you're sleeping with her baby or separately, that he will always feel that you will support him and help at any time.



After all, confidence in the mother and father now gives confidence in the future!
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Sunday, November 22, 2009

11 ways to extend the pleasure

Men faster than women not only in the run on the short and long distances. Premature ejaculation can easily interfere in obtaining sexual pleasure. We finishiruem first and where to do it, frankly, not necessarily. So, sometimes worth it to succumb. Let him come first. Moreover, the ways to extend your erection - abound.


1. Breathe. Premature ejaculation may be due to stress, tension. As in any stressful situation, during sex, too, sometimes helps recruit more air in the chest. This is how the process of delayed ejaculation Thai sage Mantak Chia: "If you feel that the eruption is approaching, take a deep breath and hold it for long breath. The pulse becomes slower, and the eruption did not happen, because in order to seed came out, the pulse is required frequently. Possessing the art of proper breathing, you however long you can keep a lid on their excitement. " Less - method requires certain skills - the first time might not be able to extend an erection.
# Clamp. The method, known to most of us - time to grab the decisive moment in the penis and gently squeeze it. Some more help to squeeze the penis in the ring of two fingers just below the head, others prefer a slightly twisted his girth as a bicycle handle, and pressing his thumb to the top of the head. (Partner this operation it is better not to trust, because only you yourself can determine exactly where and how to tap.) Penis is squeezed until until the retreat feeling inexorably approaching orgasm. Thus, premature ejaculation does not occur. This method is good because it helps a man prolong erections and have more fun than it is owed as to achieve the appearance of precursors of orgasm can be several times in a row. Less - with insufficient erections, this method can do to reduce everything to "no".
# Pull. If you feel that you hold no more power (and it still does not pretend that it is okay), you can prolong the sexual act, even in the most recent, a critical moment. Just before ejaculation, your testicles for a short time catching up (which is why you have these slozhnoformuliruemye multifaceted sensation). If you now pull the testicles back out, then the premature ejaculation delayed, and you will be able to extend an erection. You can do this myself, but to have two obstacles. First, the partner can not figure out what kind of country you've been manipulated to produce. Secondly, not everyone may like this to immediately drop everything and ... Well, too late. So, best of all, if your lady will know what is happening and proassistiruet at the right time. (After all, for whom do you try? "Personally, you already now, it will be good.) When the timpani was preparing to crash and find the strength to put it quickly notify. Let it gently prosunet hand where necessary, gather the testicles in the palm and easy to pull them down. Negatives - it is very important prior to convince her that in this case "stronger" does not mean "better." Still, it may inadvertently overdo it.
# Swap the positions. Here most important time that you spend on replacing this position. Just "turn without workpits" no particular role in delaying ejaculation not play. But before you take out, you turn, properly arranged partner, even kiss her several times, your excitement will decrease, and could be extended for another erection for some time. Less - you do not always have enough endurance.
# Pull. Premature ejaculation does not occur, if you can use a complicated method for the elect. It requires well-trained PC-muscle (musculus pubococcygeus). These muscles run from the pubis to coccyx - with their help you stop urinating. With sufficient development of these muscles, you alternately tensing and relaxing them, you can retard ejaculation and prolong erections. If you want to become a virtuoso in the delay of orgasm, the PC-train the muscles you have every day - sitting in the car, watching TV, lying in the bathroom ... Imagine that you mochishsya, and it weakens the jet, they increased - so that you can exert and relax PC-muscle. Naturally, these exercises are best done previously thoroughly empty your bladder. Less - must still zaimet there are muscles.
# Get rid of lishneg If premature ejaculation for you - rather frequent, it is not a sin to rendezvous to attend to domestic workpiece. To unburden themselves for four hours before the meeting. Less - if you want a long pause between ejaculations (more than five or six hours), then you, this method does not
# Torment. There are men who stop at this point that can really fallen telegraph pole at the ridge and extend erection for them very difficult. But most of us are completely distracted from thinking about sex if we are at this moment to grab his ear with his teeth - premature ejaculation should withdraw. It is important that the partner is not too ceremonies (tender tacking earlobe with his lips only accelerate the process), but not tyapnul accidentally to the blood. Less - painful.
# Press. Chinese way to prolong an erection, known to mankind over 5000 years old, but still less common. Just before ejaculation the man must pinch of the three fingers (middle, ring and index) to press a point on the so-called Yen-Mo. The point is located in the middle of the distance between the scrotum and anus and is usually no role in the life of man is not playing. But if you press on it at the time and with sufficient intensity for 3-4 seconds (even the index and middle fingers), then you can delay orgasm. Negatives - it should be done quietly, so your manipulation did not cause problems (what? Where? Why?).
# Deepened. The most sensitive part of the penis - head. The narrowest part of the vagina - login. So you can reduce the intensity of the friction heads, entering as deeply as possible into the body of partner and moving only rare, small shocks, almost pulling the penis out. Thus, premature ejaculation does not occur, and you can prolong an erection for some time.
# Less - delay orgasm need you now, rather than partner, which is of similar cost movements are unlikely to receive the highest satisfaction. So while you should resort to the stimulation of her clitoris, if you do not want to be your love will last forever. <
# Think. Another way to prolong an erection. Think of something shocking-chill. Imagine that you are asleep now with her mother-in. Or tax Supervisor. Or, You never can tell, with the inspector. In general, any suitable nightmarish fantasy - we will not describe them more now, you're so well imagine what this could be. But the abstract reflections on the square roots or the principles of the fax modem is not suitable. You can get distracted and premature ejaculation will come when you yourself do not want that. Negative - If you are an impressionable people, it can spoil you all the fun
# Put. Premature ejaculation will not come if you put such a banal rubber products, like condoms. It can help you prolong sex, but at the same time save on the mass of problems. Rubber rings on the penis, are sold in all the sex shops, not only will help you quickly achieve and prolong an erection, but also help to delay ejaculation.
Honor, that if wearing a ring, you feel discomfort or pain - immediately take off. And do not keep the ring on the penis for too long - it can cause stagnation of blood and cause damage to the penis. Less - traumatic. Not very suitable for first sexual experience with this partner - it can not evaluate your propensity for technology at the expense of romance.

Good sex should not last long!

Contrary to popular belief, good sex should last for hours. On the contrary, according to Canadian and American experts, just a few minutes to fully enjoy sexual intercourse. The survey involved psychologists, doctors, social workers, experts on family and marriage and nurses. Based on their responses, the researchers drew conclusions about how much should ideally last sexual intercourse.



Good sex can not last long, say scientists who conducted a survey among medical professionals. As a result, they concluded that, ideally, from penetration to ejaculation should take place on average 7-13 minutes. A sexual act, which lasts 10-30 minutes - this is more a stereotype. "Modern pop culture reinforced stereotypes about sex. Many men and women believe that the penis must be big erection - solid as a rock, and sexual intercourse should last all night ", - told the researchers.



The study's author, Professor of Psychology Eric Corti (Eric Corty) said that the expectation that sexual intercourse will last more than 30 minutes, often leads to frustration. "This situation can lead to dissatisfaction. We hope that the results of our survey will help to debunk the myths and open people's eyes to realistic information about sex. This will help to prevent disappointments and dysfunctions ", - said Professor Corti.



The researchers found, the length of a full, pleasurable sexual intercourse, and using this information hoping to help people with existing problems in sex. "If the patient is worried about how much should last sexual intercourse, these data could dissuade him in the presence of physical abnormalities, and it can be cured through counseling instead of medication," - said Professor Corti.

Women in 40 want to have sex more often than young girls

British researchers conducted a study on the change in the quality of sex in women with age. The study involved 2,000 women, 77% of whom said that their sex life was at its height, when they were between 40 and 50, wrote Sex-news.ru.

82% of this age group noted that at this age, sex important to them than ever before in my life.



Other studies confirm the findings of British doctors. Thus, in the United States found that women in 40 want to have sex more often than young girls. Therapist Jane noon, specializes in working with middle-aged women, said: "Many studies show that over the years, sex with women gets better.



This is due to the fact that women in this age have already learned to enjoy and think less of superfluous weight, how they look and so forth, in contrast to the younger. "



"Women in their forties more confident and they are not afraid of intimacy with a man," - continues the researcher.

Saturday, October 31, 2009

ED Doctor Help Reviews

About 110 million men on Earth have some form of sexual disorder, 52% of men suffer from erectile disfunktsiey.Eto Ukraine - polietiopatologichesky clinical syndrome is the inability of a full erection or maintenance required to achieve sexual satisfaction with adequate sexual stimulation. History of finding effective means to restore lost sexual opportunities for men includes several periods. The emergence and development of new therapies, comparative evaluation allowed to choose the most effective. Preference is usually given to the methods of pathogenetic treatment of erectile dysfunction and vacuum therapy, prosthetics, erektoroterapii, vascular surgery. Today is particularly relevant not only to the introduction of various treatments for this pathology, but also to find possible ways to profilaktiki.Na questions from our correspondent meets the head of the clinic sexopathology of Urology and Andrology Institute of Medical Sciences of Ukraine, the main Sexologist MZ of Ukraine, Doctor of Medical Sciences, Professor Igor Gorpinchenko .

- What are the causes of erectile dysfunction?

- An erection occurs due to increased income of arterial blood in the erectile tissues, the rise of pressure in the arteries supplying blood penis, and simultaneously decreasing the outflow of venous blood. An erection is the result of coherent interaction of the arteries, veins, nerve and muscle fibers. Her violations can be as psychogenic or organic in nature. Neurotic disorders erections occur, as a rule, not always, but in certain situations, in other similar circumstances, these disorders can not be. In clinical practice most common types of mixed disorders of erection. Know the concept of psychosomatic pathology, providing for the existence initially psychogenic disorders, which prolonged the existence of "overgrown" and form the organic changes, contributing to the initial psychogenic erectile dysfunction. "Net" psychogenic violation of sexual function, including erectile disorders, are rare. As a rule, the emergence of the latter is preceded by a disease, or there is a constitutional weakness of the reproductive system. In this situation, to create disorder can be quite unfortunate episode of sexual intercourse, which leads to further fixation, neurosis, expectation of failure, reduced sexual activity, the stagnation in the reproductive organs, contributing to pathology.

Modern sexology identifies the following risk factors for erectile dysfunction: cardiovascular pathology (ischemic heart disease, atherosclerosis), multiple sclerosis, Alzheimer's disease, depressive disorders, endocrine disorders (hypogonadism, hyperprolactinaemia, diabetes), Peyronie's disease, etc. Almost 40% of cases of violation of erection is a vascular origin.

Priority in the occurrence and development of sexual frustration, no doubt, belongs to hypertension and atherosclerosis, risk factors which are lack of exercise, excess animal fats in the diet, smoking, alcohol abuse and others. Usually pathology manifests itself in the age of 40-50 years, when the walls of blood vessels lose their elasticity, covered atherosclerotic plaques, resulting in a strong narrowing of the lumen of blood vessels. The affected artery can not provide admission to the sexual organ of the volume of blood needed for an erection.

Almost half of men suffering from diabetes, were impaired erection in varying degrees. This is caused by disorders of innervation and blood supply of reproductive organs of this pathology.
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Nearly one in four cases of sexual violation in any way associated with taking medication. This is especially true of older people, which accounted for the vast majority taken in the world of drugs. The weakening of sexual attraction - one of the most common side effects of drugs that reduce blood pressure. Antidepressants, spazmolitiki, tranquilizers, and many others that affect the nervous and cardiovascular system, reduce the potency.

For example, when studying the side effects of medicines, conducted in the United States more than 10 years ago, it was found that of the 200 most popular drugs in the country - 16 reliably cause sexual disorders. However, such a violation is most easily treatable with a decrease in medication dosage or replace them.

- Speaking about the causes of sexual disorders, it is impossible to ignore the issue, which certainly worries Ukrainians: what is the effect on the sexual ability of men of the Chernobyl accident?

- I and my colleagues have carefully studied this problem in the past 10 years, this topic is devoted to a number of scientific publications. The conclusion we arrived, is unambiguous: the Chernobyl accident, of course, impact on sexual health of the male population, especially those who worked for a long time, directly at the Chernobyl nuclear power plant, and in the adjacent area. The most typical manifestation of the impact of the Chernobyl factors - the weakening of sexual desire caused by damage to diencephalic brain areas. Fortunately, the percentage of such patients is not so much.

I would like to draw attention to one phenomenon, concerning this topic. This is due to political and economic changes that have taken place in the country in recent times. The refusal from the previous decades of evolving life indicators, primarily moral, has led to what we like to cut off the past, not instead of creating anything new. TV screens, from the pages of publications muddy stream poured into the Ukrainian nation alien to Western culture, glorifying violence, aggression, base instincts. The older and middle generation that opposed the invasion is more consistent. It is more difficult in this sense, young people who are trying to "beautiful life" in his unsettled experience. Having seen movies with half-hour scenes of stormy passion, uneducated man in the street trying all these "examples" for himself, and sexual possibilities of each - a phenomenon strictly individual. Changes have taken place, of course, brought a positive quality of sexual relations between partners. People have become more informed, liberated, open.

Friday, September 18, 2009

Home alone: is this your child?

Sooner or later parents have to leave the child at home alone. Take such a decision is not easy, because nobody knows exactly at what point the child is ready for such responsibility. His maturity from this point of view is determined by many things, so the decision should be based on comprehensive assessment. Equally important is the maturity of the older child, if you're going to leave him alone with the baby. The following questions will help you assess the independence of the child and make the right decision:

1. Can a child to repeat by heart home phone number and address? Whether he knows how to dial a phone number? Can answer phone call?

2. Can a child without leading questions to tell about the day? In the state whether it thoroughly and clearly describe what he was doing in school?

3. Does the child to stay alone at home? Not too shy he? Not afraid of a noise or dark?

4. Does the child how to behave with strangers, and in a situation when someone rings the doorbell?

5. Does the child what to do in case of fire?

6. Is the child first aid? Does he know what to do with nosebleeds, burns, bruises, cuts?

7. Have had seizures or heart attacks, leading to loss of consciousness?

8. Does the child how to call an ambulance? What has to say?

9. Does the child the basic rules of behavior at home? For example, if he knows that you can not touch a match, that there are places where it is forbidden to approach, etc.

10. Can the child and wants to follow the rules? In due time he performs the work at home and school assignments?

11. How mature a child thinks when he is given the opportunity to take an independent decision? Can I trust him the keys to the house? Can the child find a meaningful occupation, if they are no leads?

12. Are you sure that the children that you leave the house together, do not quarrel? Are they able to solve their own conflicts? How do they cope with the problems before? Is it necessary for the intervention of parents in this situation?

If you answered yes to most questions, your child is likely to be sufficiently prepared to stay home alone. Negative answers do not mean that he is slavish. This is just a signal that it should discuss with your child before you leave it unattended.

At first, better to leave the child briefly (15-30 minutes). Make sure he understands where you're located. Write down all your contact numbers and addresses, and just tell me how long you will be absent. If you are late, tell the child.

Leave the child to telephone the person with whom he can communicate in an emergency, if you do not find you. Warn the person about a possible call. All phone numbers and contacts should be prominently displayed.

This is not all you need to understand to assess the maturity and independence of their child. Here we are told only about the main points on which to focus, to make the right decision.
Rx Louisiana

If the child does not go home

In winter, when outside is cold and getting dark quickly, children have much time to spend at home. After several days of seclusion, even a TV, computer and board games are beginning to seem dull and uninteresting. Not to mention the fact that all these classes passive, and the child is almost not moving.

It is especially important to think for a son or daughter some interesting mobile occupation, when it is time for the winter blues. Otherwise, they might spoil the mood, and they become irritable and withdrawn.

If it's too cold outside for walks and games, take the child one of the following methods.

Mobile Games

* Basketball with boxes. Put one end of the room a few open boxes, and the other end of the note folded blanket throw line. Give your child the competition, who were packed into boxes rather balls or, for example, bags of dried beans. For older children, you can throw line to push away.
* Swimming in the bathtub. Let the child would put on a bathing suit and popleschetsya in the bathroom (supervised, of course).
* Jumping rope. Arrange a competition, who can jump rope longer. Record results. Let your child (and you, too!) Tries to break the record.
* Garage - stadium. Put the car on the outside (if the snow is not too much) and allow children to ride in the garage on roller skates and bicycles. 'll Have to dress them warmly, but the icy wind they will not terrible.

Art classes

· Making greeting cards (for example, on Valentine's Day). Zagotovte paper, glue, scissors, markers, magazines, glitter, and let the will of the children's imagination.

· Diary of the drawings. Give each child a small notebook, and let them paint it every day something. For a start can set the theme of the week or day, for example, family, places, favorite food, etc.

Improvised · puzzles. Take a nice picture of the magazine and stick it on a piece of cardboard. Then cut into several large pieces (or smaller pieces for older children).

Nature home

* Plant a mini-garden. Together with the children sow seeds in a pot herb and put on the windowsill. Every few days of watering. When the plants reach the desired height, cut the grass for use in the kitchen, or simply podravnyayte grass with scissors.
* Decorate the windowsills. Together with the children Plug artificial flowers and plants in the upside-down boxes for shoes, get a cheerful decoration for windowsill or kitchen table.
* Make the name plates. Assemble outside the thin branches and mangled them so that the pieces of the child is able to lay out the letters. Let the children glue the twigs out of them their names on colored cardboard and hang signs on the door of the room.

Feel inspired? Then with the children think of other exciting games and write them on cards. Once children become bored, they can draw, not looking, any card, and fun and useful employment for the house will be found!
Rx Nevada

Child tantrums under control

Many parents know the uneasy feeling one experiences during childhood tantrums. When you did not have their own children, you are probably not seen at the shop sobbing and stamping his feet baby, which Mom said terrible for two children, the word "no".

Hysterics - a real test for adults and for children. Parents are embarrassed and feel ashamed, especially if the child was made a row in a public place. Children at this moment, too, suffer confusion, anger and frustration.

Causes of child tantrums

Hysterics - a natural stage of child development. He simply learns self-control. Small children find it difficult to restrain emotions or express them in words. Therefore, in moments of anger, embarrassment or frustration, children often cry, cry, stamp their feet and even rush to the floor. Hysterics when, according to the baby, something goes wrong, when he wants to attract the attention of adults, or when he was just tired, hungry and feels helpless.

Almost all children aged 1-3 years occur hysterics. Some call this age of "terrible 2 years. After three years of hysteria are down because child learns to express his feelings. The children who found it difficult to describe their emotions words, tantrums may continue. They can occur in a later age, due to sudden changes and stress in the child's life.

Do not be surprised if your child has tantrums only occur in your presence. So he feels the strength you set the rules and restrictions. In addition, children try to show their feelings to people who you trust.

Can I prevent tantrums?

They can not completely prevent, but you can reduce the likelihood of their occurrence. Here are some tips:

* Ensure that your child is well rested, especially in front of a difficult day or an important event.
* As far as possible, stick to the regime of the day. Children - the Conservatives, it is important to know what to expect in the future.
* Do not wander too long, put your baby to bed on time. If you go on a trip, bring your favorite toys and books the child to entertain him.
* Encourage your child to express feelings in words. Can you tell a child some of the descriptions of feelings, for example, "I am very angry", etc.
* If possible, give your child the right choice. For example, if he does not want to swim, you can insist on its straightforward, and you can ask him what toys he wants to take to the bathroom.
* Before the change of activity give your child time to reorganize. He needs to switch to another activity. If approaching lunch, and the child is playing, to warn him that after 5 minutes will have to sit at the table.

What happened if hysterics?

What if nothing helps, and hysterical yet started? Here are some useful tips:

* Distract the child, switching his attention to something else: a new occupation, a toy or book. Can suddenly interrupt his words, like "Oh, look, that makes out she pussy. You can move away to another place, distracting the child with the words "But let's go out and look at the flowers. A joke or a funny mug, too, sometimes triggered.
* Try to remain calm. Cries and anger only make matters worse. The more attention you give hysterical child, the more likely it from happening again.
* Ignore the weak hysterics. Silently wait until the child stops screaming or Take him to another place where he can relax. If you go and be alone is impossible (for example, if you're in an airplane), hug a child. This will help him calm down.
* Sometimes hysteria can not be ignored. Here are examples of unacceptable behavior:

· Child pushes, beats the parents or other people

Child throws · dangerous items

· Child cries for a long time and calms

Take a breather, let your child cool. In children older than this period may last for many minutes, how many years of a child (eg, for 3-year-old child - 3 minutes).

What to do during the hysterics?

* Never punish a child for hysteria. In this case, it starts to accumulate in his anger and resentment, and it is harmful to health. Behave calmly and with understanding. With age, the child learns to better control their emotions.
* Do not praise, encourage the child for the fact that he stopped hysteria. Otherwise, he will arrange them on purpose to get what he wants.
* Do not try to reason with the child during tantrums. The logical explanation at this point is unlikely to help.
* Do not change the decisions already taken to calm the child. This will work once, but realized that with the help of hysteria can accomplish our goals, the child probably will take advantage of this and begin to manipulate you.

Teach your child to understand the word "no"

First, your baby cries, demanding to buy him a toy. Child older than "simply vital" fashionable jeans or going out with friends until midnight.

Parents are hard to master the art of saying "no". Child will go to any lengths to get her, and sometimes easier to make a concession. But do not be.

What you will encounter

Children continually check on the strength of parental authority. The older they become, the better they are able to persuade. However, children need a framework so that as they grow older they could feel safe. The ability to say "no" - an important component of the process of creating this safe zone.

You must first decide whether or not need to say "no". Try to understand why the child needed this or that thing. Ask yourself:

* Does your child need this toy or jeans? Maybe he just saw them on TV or from friends?
* Is it possible to compromise? It may be a good fit with generics? Another possible way - to offer a child a deal: let him through work at home compensates for the cost of your purchase.
* Does the friends of your child to do what he asks? Talk about it with their parents.
* Can a child be responsible for an act for which he requested permission?

Remember that:

* Tries to start detailed discussions in a situation where a child waits for an answer "yes", could lead to a quarrel.
* You are, first and foremost, a parent, and only then a friend. Do not blame yourself if the child is angry at you.
* Consent in one case and the denial of another - a good lesson in compromise for the child.
* Sometimes you can and think. Correct solution - a well-considered decision.

Older child or adolescent can try to explain his decision. Understanding the reasons for your refusal to help the child to change his point of view.

The explanations do not help in the case of a small child. It is better to simply eliminate the cause of the conflict.

If the child does not accept the answer "no"

For young children:

* Allow the child from the object, provoked hysteria. Bring your baby out of the store or go with him to another room.
* Talk with your child quietly until he calms down. If necessary, give your child a few minutes respite.
* Give your child an example of behavior by which he can explain to you what he wants:

o Politely ask
o Calmly to show that he (she) wants

For older children:

* Ask whether the child wait until the day of birth or other special occasion.
* Is the child to do some housework in exchange for a purchase?

Being a parent is not easy, and this will have to learn on the fly. It is important to vigorously defend its position. This will be a lesson for your child how important life values. Surplus of freedom will prevent your child learn responsibility, patience and compromise. Referring to a child "no", you may feel a tyrant, but to establish such a framework is very important that the child has grown a responsible person.
Rx Pennsylvania

Session horrors: terrifying treats cinema

On the street it is snowing. You dress warmly and go to the cinema to see a new blockbuster. What could be nicer than to settle in a comfortable chair with a glass of popcorn in your hands?

Is all very well, if you forget that so you add 900 calories and 70 grams of fat to your daily diet. And only if you take the average cup of popcorn, the volume of just over 300 g.

Fashion for snacks in cinemas was born in the United States. But along with increased sales of popcorn, candy and sweet drinks, have increased significantly and waist Americans. In addition, consider yourself: Why sell a pack of sweets in the cinema, designed for six? The universal fascination with large size without a doubt contributed to the alarming rates of obesity.

The sad truth about the snacks to the cinema

Popcorn

* Big hamburger with cheese and sauce and a large portion of fried potatoes on the number of calories and fat are approximately equal to a large pack of popcorn, cooked without added butter.
* Know the local movie theater, how to prepare popcorn. Some manufacturers use more useful for the cardiovascular system is not hydrogenated oils, but even in them a lot of fat and calories.

Candies

* Average packet of sweets in the cinema contains 450-750 calories.
* The least harmful diet bring chewing marmalade and chocolate candy with mint filling. However, overeating is not worth it.
* The most harmful thing - chocolates with a soft filling.

Soda and other beverages

* A small glass of lemonade in the cinema is approximately equal to the volume of bank a 330 ml. In the glass, and the bank contains 170 calories and 42 grams of sugar
* Large glass of soda contains approximately 300-400 calories (depending on how much is added to ice).
* A large portion of soda - is also 70 grams of pure sugar, or about 6 tablespoons (a quarter cup).

How to reduce the consumption of snacks in the cinema

You can not go to the movies and do without snacks? Then you will the following tips:

* Snack before going to the cinema. So you will be easier to deal with the temptations of the buffet.
* Bring snacks helpful. For example, grapes, peeled tangerines, nuts, raisins or cookies from muesli.
* Chew gum. Let your mouth is busy chewing gum or candy without sugar.
* Share! If you have not, separated by small packet of popcorn (400 calories, cooked without oil) with friends. You can not do without sweets? Buy a small pack and share with neighbors.
* Give up the soda water. It is better to take water, tea or coffee.
* Do not be offended price! More is not better. Have you ever been attracted by the promise to get 2 times more popcorn or soda, adding just one third the cost? With such a large portion of you are getting 1500 calories (so you can last for a whole day).
* Save. Snacks and drinks can cost as much as the ticket itself. Do not buy them, put money in your wallet and spend the next trip to the cinema.

Remember, there is a movie entirely optional. There is a bad habit to consider food as an indispensable part of any event. Try to just sit back, relax and enjoy the movie. This is a great way to forget about the unnecessary calories.
Rx North Dakota